... going, going, GONE

My sanity, that is.

I knew I was on my way. But this morning just pushed me over the edge.

*Forewarning: This is going to be a very whiny post.*

Moses spent the morning with a friend from church, so that K and I could get a lot done around the house. There were still a few things that needed to be cleaned in the attic, and I had some various projects I needed to work on (mine were a bit more fun: like cleaning old vintage Little People toys that I’ve been gathering off of ebay—like the Sesame Street apartment building—and getting them ready to give to Moses when his little sister is born. He’s gonna need some gifts, too, ya know!).

K had already had to take a break earlier in the week from cleaning one of the attics (our attic is actually divided into four spaces, accessible from four different doors on the second floor) because he moved something and there was a bat hibernating behind it. Don’t tell anyone, but he threw a sticky trap on it and left it there for a couple days…

So he went back to the attic today to get the last two things: Moses’ Ocean Wonders baby swing, and the cradle my dad made before I was born. Both had been put in the attic before we knew of the bat situation. But both had been completely covered with sheets which were tucked underneath.

When K went started moving the sheet off of the cradle, a bat came flying out. We’re not sure from where. But there is a chance there are bats hibernating in the cradle.

MY baby cradle. My BEAUTIFUL baby cradle. That my daddy made for me before I was born.

And that is when I lost it.

K hadn’t even gotten to the swing yet. But we discussed it and it is getting tossed. It has too many nooks and crannies to ever feel comfortable putting a baby in it (by the way, my OB/GYN FREAKED OUT when he heard we had bats). So if you are in the neighborhood and see it on the curb, DON’T pick it up…

I then looked it up on amazon (during the 10 minutes our internet worked today—but that is yet another story)—it’s 116.00.

I lost it again.

Tomorrow a friend from church (who has no fear of bats) is coming to help K de-bat the cradle. The contractor and his crew are coming later in the week to demo and remodel the attic spaces. And when the weather warms, the wildlife company is coming to seal the house.
Hopefully I will still have some sort of mental capacity by the time all of this is over.

32 weeks, and losing my sanity...

Okay, so I am really closer to 33 weeks... but my inability to post this week is just one example of how busy we have been.

But here I was last Sunday (at 32 weeks):


Moses is still into getting his picture taken in the "Mommy pose," only he is now adding to it:

Apparently he is due with a sheepdog.

My 32 week pic was taken on Sunday before church-- but I didn't go. Moses was terribly sick for a few days, and the doctor checked him out for pneumonia on Monday. His lungs were mostly clear, so we are now in the clear. But I woke up today tired all over, with a sore throat, and weepy... sure signs that I am getting sick. I don't know how that happens, after being coughed on for a week...

Hence, the losing of my sanity. Other highlights of the week included:

• Job stress-- this is one of the busiest times of the year, because the state legislative calendars run from January to May/June. So I have been on the phone so much, giving constitutional analyses and advice on bills, that I am sick of talking on the phone. And it doesn't help to be on the phone, telling a legislator why a bill is unconstitutional, when you hear the...


• Slap of the wildlife expert's laddar against the side of your house while he is inspecting for bat holes. He found several. Several holes IN the sealant the first wildlife company used. Meaning that they used the wrong thing. And we got ripped off-- to the tune of over $1000 (with the lawyer in me screaming "but we've missed the statute of limitations to sue!"). And while all this is going on, I am....
  
• Sitting in a room completely devoid of wallpaper, just waiting to be painted. But life keeps interrupting the process. Like sickness and bats and attic construction. And of course, I am also hearing...


• My baby boy hacking away in the other room, and knowing all the while that...


• The attic has to be completely cleared out (there were some things stored there before we knew of the bats) before construction can begin next week. And I do mean CLEANED out. Everything had to be disinfected before it could be brought into the other areas of the house. Per instructions of a pest control expert. *sigh*

And that was all just Monday morning. I reached the point where I was either going to start laughing hysterically, or crying hysterically.

But, GOD IS GOOD, and His blessings are abundant. Like:

• A good report from the doctor on ZuZu's health. I haven't had continual contractions (I have one every now and then) for months. She sounds great!
  
• A husband who is willing to sacrifice everything for his family. And who has a job that allows him to be flexible. He's been in the attic for almost two days straight now, cleaning things and taking them to the basement. Which, by the way, is completley dry and has never had water in it for the two years we've lived here. That's a blessing in and of itself.
  
• Job stability. It's stressful at times (okay, often), but I have a job that I love, that allows me to work from home, that I can count on. That's saying a lot in this world right now.
  
• A little boy who is finally sleeping through the night again and seems to be on the way to good health.
  
• Family members who are helping us with the bat issue (as well as keeping me clothed ;) ).
  
• The joy of being at home every day with my son.
  
• Having Moses spell his name for me, unprompted! And then, later, when I spelled "B-A-T-H" to his daddy, having him look at me and say, "No bath. No bath." He is SO stinkin' smart!
  
• The joy of getting ready for a new baby girl.

And one more blessing: a husband who will run for ice cream whenever I want it, and brings home Hershey kisses from the store. Life is pretty good, after all. :)

A few prayer requests...

First-- we are on the route to getting rid of bats! Please pray for us on Monday morning-- a new critter control company is coming to evaluate our house to see if they can tell where the bats are getting in. Please pray that they find the problem and can fix it FOREVER!

We've also begun working with a contractor who is going to remove all of the false ceilings in the attic, clean out the guano- and urine-saturated insulation, put up dry-wall and blow-in insulation, and basically seal it all up. That will prevent any bats from ever getting into our living space. AND, it will also mean a couple other things: 1) we will now have three giant walk-in closets!, and 2) we will now be able to use the huge room upstairs as a family room! And all of this is supposed to take place before ZuZu is born.

Second-- we obviously have a TON to do before the construction begins, not to mention all of the other "nesting" stuff I want done. I've also started some projects of my own-- like a couple of cute mobiles for the kids. So I need prayers for time to get it all done, and that I maintain my sanity in the process. :)

Third-- and this one is a little on the lighter side-- I need to learn to exercise some self-control, especially in light of some of the upcoming expenses (like the above). But there are just some things that I cannot resist. Like...

precious little flower clips...

and baby leg warmers...


and cute korker hair bows...

and ANYTHING with guitars on it for Moses...


But I REALLY need to stop spending money. Maybe that's not such a "light" prayer request after all! Taming my shopping might take more of a miracle than getting rid of bats.... Seriously, K needs to cancel my paypal account and confiscate my credit card...

Another Confession

Per the title of this entry, I have another confession to make (if you missed the first 10, you can see them here). This one is a little more serious.

#11: My favorite prophesy in the Bible, outside of the Messianic prophesies, is found in Obadiah 1:15:

“For the Day of the Lord draws near on all the nations. As you have done, it will be done to you. Your dealings will return on your own head.”

I know, I know. Sounds vindictive. Vengeful. Angry. I agree. But I understand that vengeance is not mine—it is God’s. And when you work in the area that I do, sometimes you just have to cling to some of the wrathful promises of God.

I don’t talk about what I do on here much. That’s for a couple reasons. One is for privacy. I have a unique and easily google-able first name. If you decide you don’t like me, you could figure out very quickly where I live. And I already know that the nation’s most notorious abortionist (one who has purposely run over pro-lifers with his car) has my home address—and that’s enough to worry about.

Another reason is because sometimes I just need a break. An escape. Which I think is why I generally try to ignore January 22. I should have probably blogged about this yesterday—that would have been blogger etiquette, right? Yesterday was the 36th anniversary of Roe v. Wade.

50 million lives lost.

A little background to put it all in context. Long-story short, I decided in fourth grade that I was going to “fight abortion.” From that time on, I knew I wanted to be a constitutional attorney. Everything I did scholastically centered around that goal. The classes I took; the grades I achieved; the activities I participated in. I studied in Washington, D.C. I interned for Congressmen and non-profit organizations. But I wasn’t really the one who did it—it was God.

So we are talking about this being my focus (or God’s focus for me) for about the last 23 years. Even in just the last 4 years, there have been joys; there have been stresses; there have been celebrations; and there has been mourning.

There are a lot of perks to my job—I work with awesome people, I have been able to do some pretty amazing and unheard of things for my age, and I get to do most of it from home, while raising my children.

But there have been some hardships. Like being in my third trimester, feeling every movement of my son, while reading graphic court testimony of how abortionists used their own fingers to pierce the skulls of babies the same age.

Like fearing that decades of common-sense laws, which protect women and have proven to reduce abortion by almost 20% in some parts of the country, will all come tumbling down if Obama signs the Freedom of Choice Act.

And so sometimes I just need to fall back on Obadiah 1:15. And remember that God is in control. And that even though I don’t have the power to change the hearts and minds of people, God does. And if they do not turn from their ways but continue the abomination, they will get their “reward.”

And even if I don’t always win, God already has.

Remember the unwanted children this week. Pray for them—and for their mommies. Abortion has two victims.

Confessions

1. I've worn the same pair of jeans to church three weeks in a row without washing them (and I don't plan to yet). When you are this pregnant, who wants to break in a fresh pair of jeans?

2. There are some days when Moses and I stay in our pajamas all day long. But I do have a pair of "nighttime pajamas" and a pair of "daytime pajamas"-- so I do change clothes-- just into other pajamas. And sometimes Moses runs around in just a diaper...

3. Maternity pants aren't fitting anymore. They are WAY too uncomfortable to wear, and they don't stay up. Another great reason for #2.

4. I think that my son is the cutest and smartest little boy in the whole world. And I tell him so frequently.

5. Along that same line, I probably say "He is just SO CUTE" about 50 times a day. I think it probably makes up for the one time a week I whine to K, "He is making me crazy!"

6. I think that "fixing" (i.e., taping) a broken wrapping paper roll three times while a child is supposed to be napping probably constitutes spoiling him. But I do it anyway.

7. I'm a terrible housekeeper. And most of the time I just don't care. I have better things to to do than vacuum or dust.

8. I also hate to cook. I can't stand the way that raw meat feels.

9. I think I'm funny. And K thinks I'm funny. But sometimes other people just don't get our jokes.

10. Sometimes I get distracted and miss large segments of the Sunday sermon because the pastor looks so darn good in his suits. Especially when he wears that light pink shirt with no tie and an open collar.

(Will I EVER be this little again?!)

Moses: Our Pride and Joy

Making his Daddy proud:

Rockin' out to Third Day, even while having his diaper changed.

Making his Mommy proud:

He's already a flag-waving Republican.


Making his PaPa proud:

He loves his CAT tractors!


Making his MaMa proud:

Check out these fine motor skills.

Making his uncle proud:

A K'Nex creation all of his own.

Making his aunt proud:


Practicing his catwalk strut. And yes, he did pick out his own outfit that day. And those pajama pants were from MaMa for his first birthday, I believe....

It's a good thing I have a sense of humor...

Remember this man from our church?

I mentioned him briefly here when describing our church's historic ice cream social.

Well, he left something for me on our car after church:

Sadly, they barely fit...

And since I am a fairly vain person, I have to also post a more flattering pic from today (31 weeks):

It's also a good thing that my pastor husband has a sense of humor, because sometimes I say things that MAYBE shouldn't come out of the preacher's wife's mouth, and he just laughs at me. Let me preface this story by saying a couple things. First, one of the questions I hate most is whether my due date is correct. It seems like such an insult to my intelligence, as if I was 14 and didn't know how my body and the whole process works. Second, the man I am referring to below is a good friend, and prides himself on being blunt and straight to the point. Thus....

When he asked me before church whether I was sure my due date is correct, I replied, "Actually, we use naturaly family planning. I can show you the chart and exactly when it happened."

No more questions were asked. :)

Is it normal toddler behavior...

...to insist on taking classic literature to nap time?

And Louisa May Alcott, at that?

What a kid. :)

A Little Pregnancy Humor...

Don't get the joke? Take a closer look:

Ha! We need to go back in about 6 more weeks when I'm even bigger. :) But should I be depressed that I don't even fit where the arrow is pointing? :)

And speaking of 6 more weeks... That's when the doctor will evaluate what in the world we are going to do with this big baby I am having. There will be three options: 1) let mother nature take its course; 2) induce early; or 3) do an elective c-section. He, of course, would always prefer #1, but he will obviously do whatever is best for the baby. But he isn't worried at all, and that made me feel better. If I was diabetic (which I'm not) or this was my first, he would be worried. But he said I have "already passed one heck of a test" by having a 9.5 pound baby, so I should be fine.

AND, this time I plan to have an epidural (yes, that's right-- I didn't exactly have one last time-- I waited until after about 14 hours of labor, and then it never took effect), and that could make all the difference in the world. I won't be quite so tired this time when it comes to pushing...

After my appointment, we went out to Applebee's, and to Home Depot and Kohl's. Hey, when you live in Mayberry, you have to take every opportunity you can to enjoy the "big city" when you are there. :)

Here is Moses' corndog kabob creation:

And his awe at being in a place so filled with gadgets:

He was a good boy all night, and he ended up with some new "silly monkey" jammies, which he carried all through the store and put on the counter to pay. He was also very good through the appointment, and it is always so cute to watch him react to ZuZu's heartbeat. This time he mouthed/open and closed his mouth for each heartbeat. So cute!

30 weeks, and getting bigger!!!

Here we are this morning:


Unreal.

I have a prenatal appointment tomorrow, and a big conversation I plan to have involves the size of this baby. We can already tell that she is quite chubby-- and we have 10 more weeks to add to that baby fat. I want to know, 1) you will definitely do another ultrasound before she is born to determine size, right? and 2) if she is over 10 pounds, are we doing a c-section? I could barely handle Moses at 9.5 pounds. I don't think I am physically OR mentally prepared for bigger than that...

Now something more fun...

I CAN'T WAIT to hold her! Seeing her beautiful face this week has made me more anxious than ever to have this baby and hold her in my arms. Every ultrasound I have sends me into shopping mode (some women have a "nesting mode"-- but part of that for me is shopping!). As soon as I saw her face and her hair, I knew I needed some more hair things! Here are *a few* that I bought this week:


(I ordered in white and oatmeal from Bow Baby Bow)


(I ordered in pink gingham from Sunshine Bowtique)


(from HairBowHolders)

I also realized that I have no receiving blankets for swadling that aren't blue. So I bought these this week as well:


(I LOVE these prints from KinderHausBlankets!)


(from Snug Bug Clothing)


Yes, I have been on esty quite a bit this week... (Thank you little bit funky and less ordinary designs for introducing me to this whole new shopping arena! :) )

But in my defense-- we all need to do our part to uphold the economy, right? :)

Two Questions

1) Do you think there is a family resemblance?


ZuZu at 29 weeks



Moses just after birth (9 lbs, 7 oz)


2) Judging by the chubbiness of our babies, do you think we need to worry about childhood obesity?





:)

And our Precious "Baby" Boy...

Yesterday I mentioned that I would post about Moses' reaction to seeing his baby sister on the screen. It was precious! As soon as her face was on the screen, Moses kind-of giggled and got excited. That lasted for about 3 minutes, and then he was bored. :) But I was so glad to see the excitement!

Here he is attentively looking at the screen:


Afterward, when the technician was printing out pictures, she let Moses help:


He has been carrying around his very own picture of ZuZu, and he points to her and says "ZuZu!" Yesterday he referred to her as his sister! That is a relief-- up until now, he has been insisting that he is having a "brudder"... It is so fun to see him getting excited!

We then went to Chili's, because Moses LOVES the chips there. Then we took him for a special treat: his first trip to Krispy Kreme! For those of you that don't know, Krispy Kreme holds a special place in our hearts. During our first year of marriage, while we waited to see where we would end up after my term working for a federal judge, K was a supervisor at the West Palm Beach Krispy Kreme. If you ever need to know anything about running a Krispy Kreme store-- from how to run the machine and make the doughnuts, to how to make the coffee drinks, to how to deal with customers-- he is the person to ask. :)

Not to brag (okay, I am bragging a little), but K was such a valued employee that they told him to let me have anything I wanted, whenever I wanted. So a good 3 times a week I got a doughnut and coffee on the way to work. When K was busy, other employees knew what I wanted and how to make it. :) The best part was that K and I would sit at home at night and dream up new doughnuts, and he would have the production ladies make them for us the next day. We had caramel-apple-filled doughtnuts, strawberry-shortcake-filled doughtnuts, etc. YUM!

BUT, back to Moses. Here is Daddy explaining the process to him:


And he and Daddy having fun in the spinning seats:


And, of course, the BEST part of all:


The three of us had no problem finishing off 18 doughnuts in 24 hours. :)

Our Beautiful Baby Girl

Last night we had the incredible blessing of seeing our precious baby girl in 3D/4D ultrasound. Everytime I woke up last night (and I do that a lot nowdays!), I was overhwhelmed with how beautiful she is and how blessed we are that God is developing such a perfect little person in my womb.

It was incredible how cooperative ZuZu was through the process (as opposed to Moses- he kept hiding his face when we did the 3D/4D with him), and even the ultrasound technician remarked that ZuZu really "hammed it up" for us. She spent about 20 minutes with her hands and feet in front of her face, trying to suck on anything she could get to. In fact, the technician said it was only the second time in her career that she had seen a baby suck on her big toe. :)

We can tell already that she has VERY chubby cheeks, she appears to look a lot like Moses did at that stage, and already has quite a bit of hair-- which she played with while we were watching. It was so amazing and precious!

SO, I introduce to you our precious Zuzu! Just look at this beautiful face! And those CHEEKS!

(appearing next to her chin are her heels!)

(here she is attempting to get her heel in her mouth)

Rubbing her face:

Sucking on her big toe (and playing with her hair with her right hand)!

Yawning (look at those gums!)

With her hands AND feet in front of her face (you can see her mouth between her ankles):

And waving? :)

Tomorrow I will post some pics of Moses' reaction, as well as the "treat" he received afterward. He was such a good big brother, and he is enjoying carrying around his own picture of ZuZu. :)

My last week in the 20s...

Doesn't that make me sound young?

Okay, so really I'M personally pushing 31... but ZuZu is 29 weeks today, so we are almost in the 30s!

Here's how we look today...

I have to say, I think it looks totally unnatural. If I saw someone on a tv show like that, I would be like, "Oh, come on, that doesn't even look real!"

Here is my view...

Here is Moses' view...

And isn't this just the cutest maternity shirt you have every seen? (Thanks, Santa! ;) )

(And look! From straight on, it appears that I still have a waist!)

I offically gave up heels today, and I actually wore jeans to church! With all the ice and yuckiness, I just decided that wearing non-dress shoes was the safest route to go... I wore heels all through my pregnancy with Moses, but back then I was still going into a REAL office to work. Now I've gotten used to working barefoot from my home. :)

Moses thought all the picture-taking today was really fun, so he decided to show off his "belly" for the camera as well...

Then he broke out into his "Snoopy Dance"...

Moses is continuing to call my tummy "Bob." He acts out Veggie Tale scenes with my stomach. And yesterday in Walmart, he was having a conversation with "Bob." A Walmart employee walking by said, "What did he say?" So I just quickly said, "Oh, he thinks my tummy is named Bob. But it's not. It's a girl...."

And speaking of having a girl... we ordered ZuZu's crib and bedding today! I LOVE it... especially the cute little rug!

Only 11 (and hopefully only 10!) more weeks to go!